Thoughts of a Working Mom....

This post is inspired by my favorite new mom, Christy. She is such a strong, fun, and caring mom to the sweetest lil baby, Jack, and is facing the "Working Mom Dilemma" as of 03/22.... After reading and hearing her concerns about going back to work, it really brought me back to the time when I was faced with the exact issue... so, Christy, I hope this makes you feel a little better and know that you are not alone! I wish I had this blogging thing when I was going through that time in my life- so I hope it will be a great tool for you to express how you feel about everything!

I remember that the worst thing you can say to a new mom that is going back to work after spending only 9 solid weeks with her newborn was "alot of mom's do it"- as almost to dimiss the fact that you are absolutely devasted that YOU have to do it. Every mom is different and every mom is allowed to feel sad, apprehensive, upset, or relieved about it. So, men, take note...be extra sensitive to a new mom who just got back to the office- we are very fragile (not to mention, just thinking or hearing our child's name can cause random lactation..whoops.)

When lil b was a newborn, I remember that I could not stop looking at him- and yes, I have to admit, that's what I did all day for 9 weeks... no t.v., no reading, no dishes, no laundry...haha. So when my time started dwindling down, I felt soooo upset that I would be seperated from my sweet baby boy. How can someone take care of him better than I can? How am I going to continue breastfeeding when I go back to work? What if something happens? How am I going to deal with missing my son's childhood and special moments? What if the daycare provider gets to see all his first everythings (smile, crawling, steps, laugh, etc)? And the worst concern for me was/is: What if he calls her Mommy and forgets that I'm his real Momma????!! ahhhh! And poor Big Blake who had to console me everytime I had a meltdown...

Lucky for Big B and me, our past experiences with putting lil b in daycare have been mostly great! After researching many daycares, both in-home and corporate, we decided that an in-home daycare would best fit our needs and our budget. We were blessed with the fact that lil b is such a chill baby and adapted easilty to each new place (we are on #3)...and that each caretaker was awesome! Here are some pros and cons of being a working mom (that I have experienced):

Pros 

• Seperation- A mother must leave child- that sounds harsh, but it helps with the seperation anxeity later... from the mother's perspective! It was easier for us to leave lil b with grandparents/aunts/uncles etc so Big B and I could enjoy a weekend away as grown ups.
• Immunity! Talk about strengthening the lil guy's system...yeah he will come home sick a few times with horrible fevers, but after those hurdles, lil b doesn't get sick that bad anymore... and it's good practice to become Dr. Mom... I am now a pro at taking rectal temps, administering medicine, nose suctioning, saline spraying, etc...
• Social Skills- lil b may be shy the first 30 seconds you meet him, but he warms up fairly quick. He loves interacting with kids and adults, but especially babies. He is currently learning how to be a great big brother (no I'm not pregnant) to a little baby girl at his daycare... when she cries he runs over, gives her HIS paci, pats her head, and gives kisses. He is also over protective when the other kids get around her... sooo cute.
• Special Moments- We really enjoy the time we do get to spend with lil b...we treasure every moment and take full advantage of the time we do have with him... it brings a whole new meaning to family time :) There's nothing better than having your toddler run up to you with a big hug and kiss when you pick them up...

Cons

• Insecurities- yep, I have them. The questions mentioned in the paragraphs above sum it up.
• Expensive!- sometimes I wonder if I am working just to put him in daycare and if it's worth it for me to keep working a full time job...so far, by our calculations, it's still beneficial for me to work (boo!)..but maybe when #2 or three come around, I will be enjoying my job as full time mom!
• Less Time- I still feel like I am missing out on shaping my child's life and seeing all his "firsts"... I wish I could be with him, watching him grow, 24/7. I think this may be the biggest con...nevermind, it IS the biggest con.
• Schedules- I usually get home only to spend 2 hours with him before he goes to bed...once again, adding on to the guilt that I am not there 24/7.
• Nursing- working fulltime and nursing felt like overtime! In fact, I had to quit nursing and go straight to the pump! This went on until he was 11 1/2 months...but so worth it...so maybe a pro too?
• Sleep Deprivation- This takes a severe toll on a mother's mentality... babies are on their own schedule, not your work schedule! I would blame my forgetfulness and delrious comments on this...often. :)

I'm sure there are more pros and cons...but I think I have whined enough for one day. Luckily I am surrounded by great family and friends who have kept my spirits high! Good Luck Christy! Call if you need anything!